Sunday, September 24, 2006

I need to say something happy.

I bought four new CD's at the
CD tradepost today! (Bob
Marley, Oppenheimer, - anyone
heard of them before? - Jimmy
Eat World, and Mutemath) I also
took a nap! Wow, awesome!

Seriously though, my day was
being emotionally wonky (a
very useful word I just learned),
until mom called me. We ended
up praying and crying together
on the phone. She is such a
lifesaver to me. She really
helped me get some perspective
on some emotional hangups and
self-centeredness I was struggling
with.

Oh, life! You can be so so crazy.
One day I'm staring out my car
window, completely overwhelmed
by the beauty of life and the
sunset that is blowing my mind,
the next I just wish my life would
be over, very soon.

I've just gotta keep growing, or
else I will be a sad person. God,
help me trust you and know you.
I've been way too scattered lately.
I need to pray.

4 comments:

renee said...

i love you.

Unknown said...

me too. very much big time.

Anonymous said...

if it makes you feel more normal (though I don't claim to be the poster child for normalcy), a few weeks ago I showed up at my mom's house, she asked me how I was... and i started bawling.

Of course, it wasn't that bad... it never really is.
But I just needed my mom to tell me that, and to let me see my way through it.

and I'll fourth the love-for-Lisa motion...


-Ali

Lisa Bender said...

Wow! I am loved! Despite all the ways they fall short, blogs sure can bring a good shot of encouragement when you have awesome friends.

I love, love, love, love you.

And Ali, that does help. Sometimes you can feel like you're the only one with problems, but then someone lets you peek below the surface and you realize you are not alone, and that somehow makes it better, strange as that may seem. We suffer, but we suffer together.

Here's to good times and better brain chemicals.